Let’s talk about forgiveness. WOW, it’s a biggy. One of the most touching things I’ve ever seen was a woman hugging and forgiving a murderer just as he was getting sent to prison to serve his time for the killing of her son. It moved me to tears.
Forgiveness is one of the golden thread principles that flows through all religions. I started introducing it into my therapy work a long time ago.
Forgiveness is something that requires daily or even weekly practice. It can transform anger, it can transform hurt, it can transform blame and also guilt and shame, especially when we forgive ourselves.
Forgiveness is powerful enough to transform anxiety (for all my anxiety warriors out there). Forgiveness is so powerful it can transform negative energy and with that it has the power to change lives.
Psychologists generally define forgiveness as a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness.
To forgive doesn’t mean that you condone bad behaviour or even forget this behaviour, what it does is give you freedom from the hurt, anger and upset that has been caused by another person.
Forgiveness allows us to take responsibility for our own healing and emotional state, emotions will impact decisions and decisions impact outcomes. When we find it in our hearts to forgive the person or people that have hurt us, it helps us to let go of anger, hurt, jealousy, the need to control and even shame and guilt. These unhelpful emotions can be replaced with peace, empowerment, focus, strength and self love! So, making a decision from a place of empowerment rather than resentment means a more positive outcome.
Some people believe that forgiving is a sign of weakness and it leaves you vulnerable but this is simply not the case; it gives you the opportunity to take your own power back. It can give you peace in your heart so that you can create a life that you really want, with no bitterness or resentment. Forgiveness is an amazing tool that helps you let go of things that YOU have done, letting go of the shame and guilt that you’ve been carrying around, often for a long time. This clears the energetic space for something more productive to come in, that serves you and supports you towards a better life.
Can you imagine forgiving yourself and others? It will drastically change your life and support you in moving forward into a life with more joy, connection, openness, self-empowerment and self-love.
I challenge you to do a week of forgiveness. At the end of every day write in your journal who you’d like to forgive and why (don’t forget yourself!) Then write down the feelings that are now available to you now that you have worked through the forgiveness. You may need to work through your forgiveness strategy more than once if there is something in particular that is bothering you. Really ‘feel’ into the shift that this can provide. It is life changing and will bring more peace into your heart. Let me know how you get on!
Love & light,